Hump Day Jokes...

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Courtesy of Just Me:
A woman walks into a Texas accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.

The accountant says,"Before we begin, I will need to ask you a few questions." He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks,"What is your occupation?"

"I'm a whore,"she says.

The accountant is somewhat taken back and says,"No, No, No, that won't work."Let's try to rephrase that."

The woman says,"OK, I'm a high end call girl."

"No, that still won't work. Try again.

"They both think for a minute; then the woman says "I'm an elite chicken farmer,"The accountant asks,"What does chicken farming have to do with being a prostitute?"

She replies,"Well, I raised a thousand little peckers last year."

The accountant says: Chicken Farmer it is!

*~*~*~*

"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up?" said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet.

"Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the teacher with a sneer.

"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."

*~*~*~*

Last night, my girlfriend and I were sitting in the living room and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

She got up, unplugged the TV and then threw out my beer. She's Such A Bitch......

*~*~*~*

Sorry I missed last week’s Jokes, I was out of power for six days!!!

~wicked love~