The Final Hump Day Jokes

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

A blonde and a brunette are on opposite sides of a river.

The brunette wants to get across.

She yells across to the blonde, "Hey, how do I get to the other side?"

The blonde shakes her head and yells back -

"People like you really piss me off. You ARE on the other side!"

~*~*~*~*~

A blonde was standing in front of a pop machine.

Her boyfriend looks over and hears her screaming at the machine..."You're a dumb-looking button!" "You don't have much of a future, either!" "You're going to be replaced by a much better looking button!" "I've got better looking buttons than you in my dresser drawer!"

Thinking she flipped her lid, her boyfriend walks over to see what the fuss is about."What in the heck are you doing?" her boyfriend asks.

The blonde quickly points to the sign on the front of the machine that reads...

"DEPRESS BUTTON FOR ICE".

~*~*~*~*~

A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job.

In the first room she said she would like a pale blue.

The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out

"GREEN SIDE UP! "

In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow.

He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled

"GREEN SIDE UP!"

The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing.

In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color.

The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled

"GREEN SIDE UP!"

The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'?"

"I'm sorry," came the reply. "But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street."

~*~*~*~*~

When asked by their host if she would like another drink, the attractive blonde bowed her head slightly and said, "No thank you. My husband limits me to one drink." "Why is that," the host asked? Her reply... "Because after one drink I can feel it; after two drinks ...anyone can!"

~*~*~*~*~

A blonde and her brunette friend were talking, when the blonde said, "I hate all the blonde jokes people tell.""Oh, they are only jokes. There are a lot of stupid people out there. Here, I'll prove it to you."They went outside and hailed a taxi driver."Please take me to 29 Nickel Street to see if I'm home," said the brunette.The taxi drove them to Nickel Street, and when they finally got out, the brunette looked at the blonde and said, "See! That guy was really stupid.""No kidding," replied the blonde. "There was a pay phone just around the corner. You could have called instead."

~*~*~*~*~

Okay WoWees, this is my last instalment of Hump Day Jokes. *awwwww* I know you all are heart broken over the news huh? *laffs* But never fear I am not going far. I am throwing some ideas around in my head of something new to offer the WoW. I’ll be back around the middle of February with my new shitt. Right now I’m getting ready for the wedding and it is taking all my free time.

~wicked love always~