Chump Day Joke (classics)

Friday, May 18, 2007

There once was a farmer. He was a dairy farmer and he loved his cows. Above all tho the other cows, he loved his Purple Cow the best.

One morning he awoke feeling upset and tired. he realized he had lost his love for his cows and it made him sad. He figured a vacation was just what he needed. So, he put an ad in the paper for a cow sitter. After many disappointing interviews, one promising young man seemed to stand out. He was fond of cows and seemed especially fond of the Purple Cow. The farmer hired him immediately and packed for his vacation.

Upon his return, he was eager to see all his cows again, especially his Purple Cow. As he crested the hill he saw his cows and the cow siter, but not his beloved Purple cow.

He asked the man. "Where is my Purple Cow?"

The man looked about confused and said, "Well, I'll be! She was right there just a minute ago and she must have gone off."

*******************

What? Not funny?

Fine. I got a better one.

This man with a cigar is riding on a train in a compartment with a woman carrying a poodle. Now, the man HATES poodles and the woman HATES cigars, right? So, they're sitting across from each other glaring and scowling. The man thinks...

I'd love to strangle that little rat of a poodle. I wish it would quit yapping.

The Lady thinks...

How rude and inconsiderate can one man BE! First he makes a mean face at my precious poodle and then he lights up that foul cigar!

Well, the woman hurridly opens a window and begins to smile. She sees a tunnel is coming up ahead. She figures she'll wait for the lights to go out and grab the cigar and toss it out the window.

The man notices her smile and interest. He looks and sees the tunnel and has similar designs to toss the poodle out the window when the lights go out.

Now they both start grinning. And he's smiling and chomping down on his stogie and she's smiling and stroking her pet, and their smiles get broader and broader until they finally hit the tunnel and the lights go out.

There's a panicked shuffling in the tunnel and then a silence. Light returns to the cabin...

And there's the Purple Cow!