Two missionaries in Africa were apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, built a huge fire under it, and left them there.
A few minutes later, one of the missionaries started to laugh uncontrollably.
The other missionary couldn't believe it!
He said, ''What's wrong with you? We're being boiled alive! They're gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?''
The other missionary replied, ''I just peed in the soup!''
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A man went over to his girl's place for a little bit of nookie between the sheets.
He presented her with three choices of condom -- gold, silver, or bronze.
"Silver," she said.
"Why not gold?"
"Because I want you to come second for once!"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
An old farmer decided it was time to get a new rooster for his hens. The current rooster was still doing an okay job, but he was getting on in years and the farmer figured getting a new rooster couldn't hurt. So he buys a new cock from the local rooster emporium, and turns him loose in the barnyard. Well, the old rooster sees the young one strutting around and he's a little worried about being replaced. He walks up to the new bird.
"So you're the new stud in town? I bet you really think you're hot stuff don't you? Well I'm not ready for the chopping block yet. I'll bet I'm still the better bird. And to prove it, I challenge you to a race around that hen house over there. We'll run around it ten times and whoever finishes first gets to have all the hens for himself."
Well, the young rooster was a proud sort, and he definitely thought he was more than a match for the old guy.
"You're on," he said, "and since I'm so great, I'll even give you a head start of half a lap. I'll still win easy!"
So the two roosters go over to the henhouse to start the race with all the hens gathering to watch. The race begins and all the hens start cheering the old rooster on. After the first lap, the old rooster is still maintaining his lead.
After the second lap, the old guy's lead has slipped a little -- but he's still hanging in there. Unfortunately, the old rooster's lead continues to slip each time around, and by the fifth lap he's just barely in front of the young fella. By now the farmer has heard the commotion. He runs into the house, gets his shotgun and runs into the barnyard figuring a fox or something is after his chickens. When he gets there, he sees the two roosters running around the henhouse, with the old rooster still slightly in the lead. He immediately takes his shotgun, aims, fires, and blows the young rooster away.
"Damn. That's the third gay rooster I've bought this month."
~hump day love~
5 comments:
Dr. Murk has a gay cock
LMAO ...umm how do you know that for a fact? ~laffs~
He's seen it. It's the gayest cock in all the land! Lord Gaycock is my name and gay is my game.
*dances and sings*
My Gaycock brings all the boys to the yard. And they're like, "It's better than yours." Damn right. It's better than yours. I could teach you, but I'd have to charge!
I just pee'd in this post. *teehee!*
You did what???? *grins & giggles*
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