The Truth is Far, Far Away!

Monday, March 05, 2007

I was totally blown away from reading this, if all these allegations are true... then the wool has truly been pulled over our eyes.


Uncomfortable Truth: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?

We’ve all heard the “official conspiracy theory” of the Death Star attack. We all know about Luke Skywalker and his ragtag bunch of rebels, how they mounted a foolhardy attack on the most powerful, well-defended battle station ever built. And we’ve all seen the video over, and over, and over, of the one-in-a-million shot that resulted in a massive chain reaction that not just damaged, but completely obliterated that massive technological wonder.

Like many Americans, I was fed this story when I was growing up. But as I watched the video, I began to realize that all was not as it seemed. And the more I questioned the official story, the deeper into the rabbit hole I went.

Presented here are some of the results of my soul-searching regarding this painful event. Like many citizens, I have many questions that I would like answered: was the mighty Imperial government really too incompetent to prevent a handful of untrained nerf-herders from destroying one of their most prized assets?

Or are they hiding something from us?

Who was really behind the attack?

Why did they want the Death Star destroyed?

No matter what the answers, we have a problem.



Below is a summary of my book, Uncomfortable Questions: An Analysis of the Death Star Attack, which presents compelling evidence that we all may be the victims of a fraud of immense proportions.


1) Why were a handful of rebel fighters able to penetrate the defenses of a battle station that had the capability of destroying an entire planet and the defenses to ward off several fleets of battle ships?

2) Why did Grand Moff Tarkin refuse to deploy the station’s large fleet of TIE Fighters until it was too late? Was he acting on orders from somebody to not shoot down the rebel attack force? If so, who, and why?

3) Why was the rebel pilot who supposedly destroyed the Death Star reported to be on the Death Star days, maybe hours, prior to its destruction? Why was he allowed to escape, and why were several individuals dressed in Stormtrooper uniforms seen helping him?

4) Why has there not been an investigation into allegations that Darth Vader, the second-ranking member of the Imperial Government, is in fact the father of the pilot who allegedly destroyed the Death Star?

5) Why did Lord Vader decide to break all protocols and personally pilot a lightly armored TIE Fighter? Conveniently, this placed Lord Vader outside of the Death Star when it was destroyed, where he was also conveniently able to escape from a large-sized rebel fleet that had just routed the Imperial forces. Why would Lord Vader, one of the highest ranking members of the Imperial Government, suddenly decide to fly away from the Death Star in the middle of a battle? Did he know something that the rest of the Imperial Navy didn’t?

6) How could any pilot shoot a missile into a 2 meter-wide exhaust port, let alone a pilot with no formal training, whose only claim to fame was his ability to “bullseye womprats” on Tatooine? This shot, according to one pilot, would be “impossible, even for a computer.” Yet, according to additional evidence, the pilot who allegedly fired the missile turned off his targeting computer when he was supposedly firing the shot that destroyed the Death Star. Why have these discrepancies never been investigated, let alone explained?

7) Why has their been no investigation into evidence that the droids who provided the rebels with the Death Star plans were once owned by none other than Lord Vader himself, and were found, conveniently, by the pilot who destroyed the Death Star, and who is also believed to be Lord Vader’s son? Evidence also shows that the droids were brought to one Ben Kenobi, who, records indicate, was Darth Vader’s teacher many years earlier! Are all these personal connections between the conspirators and a key figure in the Imperial government supposed to be coincidences?

8) How could a single missile destroy a battle station the size of a moon? No records, anywhere, show that any battle station or capital ship has ever been destroyed by a single missile. Furthermore, analysis of the tape of the last moments of the Death Star show numerous small explosions along its surface, prior to it exploding completely! Why does all evidence indicate that strategically placed explosives, not a single missile, is what destroyed the Death Star?

80 comments:

Anonymous said...

Um, HELLOOOOOOO!

I think the Ewoks did it.

Anonymous said...

yub nub!

Christopher said...

Oh man, here we go again. Another conspiracy from the Left bashing Palpatine.

Look, I don't even support what Palpatine did and I'm an Imperial! But taking pot shots at him to get Lando Calrissian elected so that your precious Rebel Alliance can sit on the throne again is absurd.

The Death Star was destroyed by the Rebels, PERIOD.

Stop all this nonsense.

fuck.

Anonymous said...

5TKAcY The best blog you have!

Anonymous said...

rPUmRo Wonderful blog.

Anonymous said...

Thanks to author.

Anonymous said...

Thanks to author.

Anonymous said...

Wonderful blog.

Anonymous said...

Please write anything else!

Anonymous said...

Good job!

Anonymous said...

Nice Article.

Anonymous said...

Magnific!

Anonymous said...

Good job!

Anonymous said...

fKqkP9 write more, thanks.

Anonymous said...

actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.

Anonymous said...

Nice Article.

Anonymous said...

Please write anything else!

Anonymous said...

Nice Article.

Anonymous said...

Magnific!

Anonymous said...

Please write anything else!

Anonymous said...

Hello all!

Anonymous said...

Good job!

Anonymous said...

Good job!

Anonymous said...

Please write anything else!

Anonymous said...

actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.

Anonymous said...

Thanks to author.

Anonymous said...

What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?

Anonymous said...

If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.

Anonymous said...

Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.

Anonymous said...

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!

Anonymous said...

All generalizations are false, including this one.

Anonymous said...

actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.

Anonymous said...

Beam me aboard, Scotty..... Sure. Will a 2x10 do?

Anonymous said...

Wonderful blog.

Anonymous said...

Thanks to author.

Anonymous said...

Magnific!

Anonymous said...

Save the whales, collect the whole set

Anonymous said...

Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery.

Anonymous said...

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

Anonymous said...

Clap on! , Clap off! clap@#&$NO CARRIER

Anonymous said...

What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?

Anonymous said...

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Anonymous said...

Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!

Anonymous said...

What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?

Anonymous said...

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Anonymous said...

Clap on! , Clap off! clap@#&$NO CARRIER

Anonymous said...

Oops. My brain just hit a bad sector.

Anonymous said...

Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.

Anonymous said...

640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates 81

Anonymous said...

All generalizations are false, including this one.

Anonymous said...

If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.

Anonymous said...

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Anonymous said...

What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?

Anonymous said...

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

Anonymous said...

Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies

Anonymous said...

Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.

Anonymous said...

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

Anonymous said...

640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates 81

Anonymous said...

Wonderful blog.

Anonymous said...

C++ should have been called B

Anonymous said...

Hello all!

Anonymous said...

The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

Anonymous said...

Thanks to author.

Anonymous said...

Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.

Anonymous said...

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!

Anonymous said...

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

Anonymous said...

What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?

Anonymous said...

What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?

Anonymous said...

C++ should have been called B

Anonymous said...

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

Anonymous said...

Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!

Anonymous said...

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Anonymous said...

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

Anonymous said...

Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!

Anonymous said...

What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?

Anonymous said...

Beam me aboard, Scotty..... Sure. Will a 2x10 do?

Anonymous said...

Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.

Anonymous said...

actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.

 
 
 
 
Copyright © Wand of Wonder 2.0