The Continuing Adventures of Geordi LaForge: Episode 2

Thursday, August 14, 2008

"You're in sick bay," Dr. Crusher told him. "It seems space syphillis nearly killed you."

"Uh," Geordi groaned, "I have to go check the warp core."

"No no no," Dr. Crusher said, "You need your rest. Lt. Steve can handle the warp core."

"Lt. Steve?" Geordi said, "But he can't handle a kitten without it getting pregnant."

"Wesley," Dr. Crusher said, "Watch him." Wesley crusher strutted up to him.

"Yo, G-L-F, waddup!" He put his hand out. Geordi rolled over. "No love for your brotha man?"

"Wesley, you're not even black," Geordi said.

"You straight trippin' G," Wesley said. "Yo, whats da jibber jabber 'bout you and Warf hittin' skins in the pen?"

Geordi's communicator squeaked. "Goerdi," Captain Picard said, "I need you on the bridge, immediately."

"Captain, I'm stuck in sick bay with Wesley," Geordi said.

"Wesley?" The Captain shouted, "Yo, waddup, playa!"

"Yeah, JLP, belee dat!" Wesley hopped up on Geordi's bed and started dancing.

"Get down," Geordi yelled.

"Get down!" Wesley agreed. He danced like mad.

"Get down! Get down!" Picard agreed, "Go Geordi, it's yo birthday!"

"It's not my birth day, stop!" Geordi said.

"Stop," Picard shouted. Wesley stopped. "Hammer time!" Picard shouted.

"Data to LaForge," Data said over the communicator.

"Go ahead Data," Geordi said.

"Geordi," Data said, "I'm still having trouble with that repetative distraction I told you about."

Geordi sighed. "Data, look it's natural. We all go throw a phase like this..."

"It's been 122 1/2 days," Data said. "My android sythoskin is starting to wear off. I can see metal."

Geordi's communicator clicked. "Geordi," Picard said. "Are you coming up to the bridge or what? There's a bee in here."

"I'm in sick bay," Geordi said.

"A bee, Geordi," Picard said, "I'm frightened of them Geordi! Geordi! LaForge to the bridge with the bug spray. Geordi! Bees. Help. Help."

"Have Riker kill it," LaForge suggested.

"Fuck off, homo," Riker said in the background.

"Son of a bitch stung me!" Picard said. "Geordi, how long will it take to reach the planet of the bees? A few minutes?"

Wesley came back dressed in gangsta gear. "You gonna be the bitch in my new gang," Wesley said. Geordi kicked him in the nose, killing him instantly.

"Murderer," the computer said. "Red alert. Red alert."

Worf dashed into sick bay.

"Hmmmm," he said, eyeing LaForge, "This day is looking better already."

To be continued...