Punisher: Warzone - a review

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Finally . . .
So, Malach, the Angry Piper, and Dr. Murk went to see Punisher: Warzone on Sunday, but Dr. Murk didn't show up, using one of his stupid typical excuse about not wanting to be seen in public with the likes of us, yeah whatever.

So, Malach, dressed of course in the trademarked assless chaps, and The Piper of course kilted met each other at the Cinema, and spent several minutes marveling at the Watchmen stands. Piper order some popcorn, with I am sure the standard hole in the bottom to place his erect penis, and Malach got a small Pepsi and some Milk Duds.

So we headed into the theater, we were the first ones there, so that gave us some quick make out time, but soon the theater was packed with 6 other people. The trailers started (sorry Tom Cruise, Valkyrie looks stupid), and soon we were starting the main flick, sans sound. This of course cheesed off the Piper to now end, and he went back to roundhouse kick the cinema manager, who proceeded to fix the sound.

The movie itself. Finally, the have done a proper Punisher movie. Brutal, violent, unyielding, and blood spattered; that has almost always been the Punisher in comics, and this movie delivers that. THIS IS NOT A SUPERHERO MOVIE. Don't be a idiot like the guy in front of us who brought his 8 year old. The movie is violent, and bloody. Also this is not a sequel to the 2004 movie, it is a reboot of the series which it needed.

Now, this is not a great movie in the vein of Iron Man or Dark Knight. This movie is not for everyone, but I enjoyed, and I am a long time fan of the Punisher. This movie does and excellent job of showing Frank Castle's obsessive war on crime, his violent black and white punishment of the criminal underworld, the why he does it, and even his pain of understanding the irony of his quest. Ray Stevenson is the perfect Punisher, in look and personality. Malach has commented that this style of the Punisher would make an excellent weekly TV series.

The actors they got playing the various characters all did a pretty good job, Wayne Knight (Newman of Seinfeld fame) played the perfect Microchip and Dash Mihok played the perfect Martin Soap. Dominc West did a pretty good job as Jigsaw, though I felt he was a little too over the top, too much Joker and not enough Whitey Bulger. Doug Hutchinson movie created character of Jigsaw brother Looney Bin Jim also does an excellent job, but I am not really sure he was needed for this movie.

Overall it was good movie, especially if you are fans of the Punisher, violence, vigilantism, and blood.

I am Malach, and I held hands with the Piper.