I was totally blown away from reading this, if all these allegations are true... then the wool has truly been pulled over our eyes.
Uncomfortable Truth: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?
We’ve all heard the “official conspiracy theory” of the Death Star attack. We all know about Luke Skywalker and his ragtag bunch of rebels, how they mounted a foolhardy attack on the most powerful, well-defended battle station ever built. And we’ve all seen the video over, and over, and over, of the one-in-a-million shot that resulted in a massive chain reaction that not just damaged, but completely obliterated that massive technological wonder.
Like many Americans, I was fed this story when I was growing up. But as I watched the video, I began to realize that all was not as it seemed. And the more I questioned the official story, the deeper into the rabbit hole I went.
Presented here are some of the results of my soul-searching regarding this painful event. Like many citizens, I have many questions that I would like answered: was the mighty Imperial government really too incompetent to prevent a handful of untrained nerf-herders from destroying one of their most prized assets?
Or are they hiding something from us?
Who was really behind the attack?
Why did they want the Death Star destroyed?
No matter what the answers, we have a problem.
Below is a summary of my book, Uncomfortable Questions: An Analysis of the Death Star Attack, which presents compelling evidence that we all may be the victims of a fraud of immense proportions.
1) Why were a handful of rebel fighters able to penetrate the defenses of a battle station that had the capability of destroying an entire planet and the defenses to ward off several fleets of battle ships?
2) Why did Grand Moff Tarkin refuse to deploy the station’s large fleet of TIE Fighters until it was too late? Was he acting on orders from somebody to not shoot down the rebel attack force? If so, who, and why?
3) Why was the rebel pilot who supposedly destroyed the Death Star reported to be on the Death Star days, maybe hours, prior to its destruction? Why was he allowed to escape, and why were several individuals dressed in Stormtrooper uniforms seen helping him?
4) Why has there not been an investigation into allegations that Darth Vader, the second-ranking member of the Imperial Government, is in fact the father of the pilot who allegedly destroyed the Death Star?
5) Why did Lord Vader decide to break all protocols and personally pilot a lightly armored TIE Fighter? Conveniently, this placed Lord Vader outside of the Death Star when it was destroyed, where he was also conveniently able to escape from a large-sized rebel fleet that had just routed the Imperial forces. Why would Lord Vader, one of the highest ranking members of the Imperial Government, suddenly decide to fly away from the Death Star in the middle of a battle? Did he know something that the rest of the Imperial Navy didn’t?
6) How could any pilot shoot a missile into a 2 meter-wide exhaust port, let alone a pilot with no formal training, whose only claim to fame was his ability to “bullseye womprats” on Tatooine? This shot, according to one pilot, would be “impossible, even for a computer.” Yet, according to additional evidence, the pilot who allegedly fired the missile turned off his targeting computer when he was supposedly firing the shot that destroyed the Death Star. Why have these discrepancies never been investigated, let alone explained?
7) Why has their been no investigation into evidence that the droids who provided the rebels with the Death Star plans were once owned by none other than Lord Vader himself, and were found, conveniently, by the pilot who destroyed the Death Star, and who is also believed to be Lord Vader’s son? Evidence also shows that the droids were brought to one Ben Kenobi, who, records indicate, was Darth Vader’s teacher many years earlier! Are all these personal connections between the conspirators and a key figure in the Imperial government supposed to be coincidences?
8) How could a single missile destroy a battle station the size of a moon? No records, anywhere, show that any battle station or capital ship has ever been destroyed by a single missile. Furthermore, analysis of the tape of the last moments of the Death Star show numerous small explosions along its surface, prior to it exploding completely! Why does all evidence indicate that strategically placed explosives, not a single missile, is what destroyed the Death Star?
The Truth is Far, Far Away!
Monday, March 05, 2007
Posted by Captain Flak Paperpants at 8:39 AM
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80 comments:
Um, HELLOOOOOOO!
I think the Ewoks did it.
yub nub!
Oh man, here we go again. Another conspiracy from the Left bashing Palpatine.
Look, I don't even support what Palpatine did and I'm an Imperial! But taking pot shots at him to get Lando Calrissian elected so that your precious Rebel Alliance can sit on the throne again is absurd.
The Death Star was destroyed by the Rebels, PERIOD.
Stop all this nonsense.
fuck.
5TKAcY The best blog you have!
rPUmRo Wonderful blog.
Thanks to author.
Thanks to author.
Wonderful blog.
Please write anything else!
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Magnific!
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fKqkP9 write more, thanks.
actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.
Nice Article.
Please write anything else!
Nice Article.
Magnific!
Please write anything else!
Hello all!
Good job!
Good job!
Please write anything else!
actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.
Thanks to author.
What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.
Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!
All generalizations are false, including this one.
actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.
Beam me aboard, Scotty..... Sure. Will a 2x10 do?
Wonderful blog.
Thanks to author.
Magnific!
Save the whales, collect the whole set
Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery.
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.
Clap on! , Clap off! clap@#&$NO CARRIER
What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Clap on! , Clap off! clap@#&$NO CARRIER
Oops. My brain just hit a bad sector.
Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.
640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates 81
All generalizations are false, including this one.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies
Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates 81
Wonderful blog.
C++ should have been called B
Hello all!
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
Thanks to author.
Build a watch in 179 easy steps - by C. Forsberg.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
C++ should have been called B
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
What is a free gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
Beam me aboard, Scotty..... Sure. Will a 2x10 do?
Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.
actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.
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